No
Through me
No
No no
She looked into me
Deeply
She looked into me
Into a place
No one had looked before
Not even I
I felt it
She saw something
Something no one had seen before
Not even I
I felt that too
Deeply
She saw what it was
Which would keep us apart
Which would keep me apart
Apart from her
Apart from everyone
She looked at me
With a sadness
Complete
Final
Deep
A sadness for the loss of us
A sadness for the loss of me
A sadness for me
What she saw
Was the kernel of fear
Which ruled me
Had always ruled me
Would always rule me
She leaned in
Kissed me gently
Cradling my cheek in one hand
Then whispered in my ear
Lover
It is only fear
It is not you
She withdrew
Looked into me again
It need not be you
Then I saw
Deeply into her
Into her sadness
A sadness not for me
Not for what I was
But for what I saw
And how I saw it
A sadness not for a kernel
Of immutable fear
But for my seeing fear
As immutable
I collapsed
Into her arms
And when she could
Gently wipe the tears
From my eyes
I saw in her eyes
The love
Her love
Deeply
The love my fear
Had never let me see
Gabriola Mansion
West End
Vancouver
British Columbia, Canada
Taken last night on location for The Magicians, Season 2, 2016